Waste Basket Memories

June 4, 2014

"I've been going over things in my mind. I call them 'waste basket memories'....I thought I had put them out of my mind, but they're there and I can pull them up again." 


Like most of the conversations with Alice that stick out to me, I have no idea how this one got started. She was sitting in her chair and I was sitting in a chair facing her. All of a sudden, I started repeating the words in my mind as she was saying them because I didn't want to forget them.

At 91, Alice has all kinds of memories and now she has all kinds of time. These memories come to her mind from out of nowhere. Lately, I guess she's had reason to go over some of the less pleasant ones. I don't know if she's pulling them out on purpose or if things are reminding her of them, but the fact is, she calls them "waste basket memories" for a reason.

91 year old Alice is struggling with them a little bit, but 15 year old Alice and 23 year old Alice and 40 year old Alice all knew what to do with them. As the memories were made, she put them into the waste basket which was right where they belonged. Up until recently, most of those memories were all but forgotten. I'm sure she pulled some of them out every now and then, but it never did any good so she threw them right back away.

When Alice talks, I listen. We all have our fair share of memories that are better off forgotten. A day may come when we find ourselves with a lot of time to sit and stew, but I pray that we all remember Alice's words about waste basket memories. There's no going back to change or fix anything. Let's take the memories that belong in the waste basket and leave them right where they belong.

Just like Alice's memories, they'll still be in our minds, but let's hear the regret in her voice at 91 and learn to just let them be.